You Can't Reinforce Bad Behavior Using EFT

Q. When choosing phrases for EFT, is there any way to create a phrase that wouldn't work? I know the phrase should be the negative thing I do, but I sometimes worry that I'm picking the wrong phrases and reinforcing the bad behavior.

A. You can't do it wrong, so just let that thought go fly out the door. If you're not convinced, do some EFT on that:

"Even though I think I'm going to be screwed up by saying what I don't want, I deeply and completely accept myself."

"Even though I'm afraid I'm going to do this wrong and make things worse, I deeply and completely accept myself."

You want to feel the behavior while you are tapping. The words aren't that important, really. It's the way you are thinking and feeling that matters, so let's say I want an ice cream, but I sort of don't want it because I said I was going to eat really clean today (meaning no junk at all, including sugary sweets), so what I'd do is try to bring up my desire for the ice cream as big and bright as I can.

Now, I'm thinking of the ice cream, and maybe I'd say, "Even though I REALLY WANT an ice cream, and I know it's going to be so creamy delicious, and I can't wait for it, I deeply and completely accept myself."

Then as I'm tapping, I'd be saying, "Yum, it's so good, Oh, this is going to be the best ever. I can't wait for my ice cream. I just love ice cream," and I make Homer Simpson sounds, the way he goes all drooly over doughnuts (if you don't know, Homer Simpson is a cartoon character with a funny voice).

Then, when I'm done, I just straighten up in my chair, pull back my shoulders, move my head a bit side to side or maybe do a neck roll, take a sip of water, and a deep breath. Then, I reassess how much do I want the ice cream.

You'll notice my intention never was to stop wanting the ice cream. I was just doing EFT straight by the book. This nearly always reduces the desire. Sometimes that's all it takes for me to say, "Maybe I'll wait and have it later," or I can have some tomorrow if I still want it, and then I go about my day.

Often I'll notice that several days have gone by and I forgot all about the the ice cream. That's just one example.

I like to use EFT and see what happens when I'm really craving something that I would prefer not to have, but I don't try to not want it, if that makes sense. In fact, I try to bring my desire even higher.

After the round, I see if my desire has changed, and if it is still fairly high, I'll do another quick round. It usually takes two times or only once for me. Try it yourself.